First they came for Robert Lee, and I did not speak out … because I did not care

Photo credit: CNN Money.

Kudos to ESPN for spinning controversy out of the grips of a non-story with this Robert Lee announcing controversy. Thank goodness we will no longer be reminded of a Confederate general who died nearly two centuries ago while watching an Asian man with the same name attempt to call a football game.

Instead of just letting the young man announce the UVA game and withstanding an hour’s worth of “LOL ROBERT LEE IS ALIVE AND WELL,” memes on twitter, you’ve created a mini-controversy that is garnering far more negative attention than just ignoring it in the first place.

It’s akin to looking at a gorgeous piece of forest, realizing that it may be at risk for a forest fire in the future, and then lighting a match and throwing it into a pile of dead leaves. ::claps hands as the forest goes up in flames:: GOOD JOB EVERYONE. PROBLEM SOLVED.

Is it that big of a deal that he was taken off the broadcast? Not really. It does, however, set you up for future incidents with names that people may find offensive. Kirk Herbstreit? Sounds too much like Wall Street, and you remember what happened with the real estate crash 10 years ago. GET THAT HOMEWRECKER OFF MY SCREEN, HE IS THE SOLE REASON I DEFAULTED ON MY MORTGAGE.

Think it’s just a national problem? Who is to say Philadelphians won’t start clamoring for announcers to be taken off the air in our city? Who is at greatest risk of being taken off the air for their name? Let’s investigate after the jump…

Tom McCarthy: Does anyone remember McCarthyism in this country? BETTER DEAD THAN RED. Do we need to be reminded of such an embarrassing chapter in American history? So long, Tom, don’t let the door hit your hammer and sickle loving ass on the way out of the booth.

John Kruk: Kruk….cuck? Need I say more? Bye bye, snowflake.

Merrill Reese: Should a man with a possible woman’s first name be allowed to call football in Philadelphia. I think not. See ya.

Mike Quick: Let’s see how “quick” we can find a reason to get you out of the radio booth, Mike (lol, great job Coggin). I see you have a mustache, Mr. Quick. You know what famous despot and mass murderer had a mustache? That’s right, HITLER. Beat it.

Jim Jackson: Jim “Stonewall” Jackson? The South shall not rise again while I’m on the case.

Marc Zumoff: Marc with a “C” instead of a good old fashioned American “K?” What do you have to hide, Mr. Zumoff? Why don’t you “zoom off” my television and never come back.

Alaa Abdelnaby: I see no problems here.

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